Real Change is Possible!

Just as every year passes and the seasons change, we change and grow. This is called evolution. Nothing remains the same, change is the one constant in our lives that we can count on. Loved ones close to us pass on and others pass through and new people enter. Life can be like a revolving door at times. New jobs, new locations, new scenery. Babies being born, kids go off to college, we remodel our homes, get new hairdos, buy newer cars, shape new bodies, acquire diplomas, and get upgrades of all kinds. Our physical, outer world is constantly in a state of flux. If we cling tightly to what is leaving or has left us, we will suffer. We have to adapt to our new reality in order to thrive. Change is a process. We are constantly being given opportunities to change our inner world.
Our inner world is the way we perceive ourselves and the world around us. It is our belief systems, our connection to Source, our understanding of who we are and how we fit into the grand scheme of things. Our inner world is where our thoughts and dreams originate, our words and what we create. So often we can get stuck in a rut, thinking and creating the same thing that perhaps we don’t want to and we wonder why that happens. Real change is possible but you have to really want it more than you want the comfort of the familiar. Sometimes we don’t ask for the change, it’s delivered to us from the Universe in what can seem cruel and unforgiving at the time. True change can be a bit scary, but you will know when it’s time for it because you will be so sick of the current reality that you may want to check out. It may even feel like you’re dying or want to die but what’s happening is that your old self is at that place of dying and your new self is waiting for you to let go so it can be born! You’ve got to trust and let go…surrender.
Everyone will go through change slightly differently because we are all having our own experience, unique to who we are and we are all in our own phase. Even so, there are some similarities to the process:

  1. Decision – when the time comes that you just can’t take it any more, you make a decision, which means you make a choice that you are going to go in a new direction and then you actually stick to that choice. Decide comes from a Latin word “cide” which means to cut off or kill. To decide means you literally cut off all other options. You choose a new path.
  2. Self-Image – you create a new image of who you want to be and convince yourself that you can be that person. Who do you admire? What qualities do they possess? What qualities, behaviors and actions will the new you demonstrate? It’s a good practice to visualize how you will look, what you will be doing as this new you. Where will you be? What are your heart’s desires, your heart holds the key to the new you.
  3. Beliefs – when you choose your new path, you are fully invested in believing this is the new path for you and that you are that person who can walk that path and be that version of yourself. This belief is solidified within your mind, heart and energy field. There’s no looking back.
  4. Boundaries – not everyone is going to like it when you change because it may feel scary to them that you are no longer acting like the person they knew before once you re-define your boundaries and stick with them. It’s necessary to draw new lines in the sand that people can’t cross. When you do this, it may cause some waves at first, but ultimately, you will garner respect. Some people may bounce right out of your life. Let them.
  5. New Circle – it will be important to support yourself in this transformation however you need to which means you may change the people you surround yourself with that believe and encourage you to be this new version of yourself. As your frequency raises, you will attract people into your life that are on that new vibrational level as you. Let the old go & embrace what and who is showing up now.
  6. Thoughts, Words & Behaviors – You will literally need to think different thoughts, speak different words and act in different ways to become the new version of you. This takes practice and repetition. If you find yourself reverting to your old patterns of thoughts and behaviors, realign yourself by reminding yourself of who you want to be. You can work with a hypnotist, coach, or energy healer to learn how to transform the patterns that reside in the subconscious.
  7. Connection to Source – By connecting to God, the Universe, your Inner Being…whatever you want to call it, you are empowering yourself and filling yourself with the Light that will help you raise your vibration and reach that next level. This is called alignment and will keep you in the flow of everything that the Universe wants to deliver to you.
  8. Trust – The antidote to fear and anxiety is trust. Trust in the process of the unfolding of your life. It is scary and not easy to change your form. Just ask any caterpillar…but look what comes out on the other side! Be brave, and stay the course. Your heart is where you will find your courage.
  9. Love – Love yourself through all of it, the scary, the letting go, the tears, the uncertainty….all of it. Just keep telling yourself, “I Love You & I believe in You”. Accept all of your past, who you were & what you experienced without judgment. Wholeness requires total self-acceptance.

These are just some guide posts for your transformational journey. The Universe is constantly working with you to help you evolve and it’s happening on a massive scale right now. We are in transformational times and our very existence depends on us changing so that we make better choices for ourselves and this planet.

We are meant to evolve. We know how painful it is to watch loved ones who don’t make the changes that are so obvious to us that we know will make them happier people. Let go of how you think the way things “should” be and open yourself up to receive what is coming in. Raise your vibration so that you create the highest and the best for your self. It is less about striving and more about aligning and allowing.

My friend Jess Holland and I are facilitating a course called “Loving My Life!” for women in Syracuse who could use some support and guidance as they make those changes. It’s wonderful to have someone walk you through the steps and give you the encouragement you need to stick with it until your beautiful wings unfold and you can fly on your own.

Real change is messy. When it’s done right, it will crack you open revealing all the gory guts you’ve tried so hard to repress. It will stir up your most painful memories and feelings and ask you to really look at them, process them and then release them forever. Forever, as in never to come back and haunt you again in the wee hours of the morning when you’re trying to get a some decent sleep.

Real change requires brutal honesty so that you can arrive at a place of your TRUTH. We are so conditioned by everything and everyone around us all the time…how often do you actually drop into your own heart and soul and find out what your true desires are? At some point along your journey you begin to realize that you might be sacrificing your truth for the status quo. I don’t really like working a corporate job that gives me the security that’s supposed to make me feel good but instead I feel like my life is slipping by before my eyes and I’d much rather be a writer. Or why am I living in the woods when my happy place is the beach? Whatever your truth is, it’s your truth and you’ve got to follow it and quit pleasing others because this is your life and yours alone. Imagine you’re lying on your death bed and you look back and find that you did everything so well to make everyone else happy and someone is busy engraving your tombstone to read “best people pleaser ever!”…. It’s your life and you get to do what you want with it. It’s called being authentic and it’s a place that is pure bliss for those who actually make their way there. But getting there is far from blissful.

Real change happens when you’ve reached the last rung of the phase and cycle you’re in and then it’s time to move to the next cycle. Let your truth lead the way. Remember, it may feel like you’re dying, but it’s only what needs to fall away that is dying, let it die, and welcome the new dawn that is rising on your new life.

Blessings on your (new) path!